[科幻]宿主-第147章

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have　been　able　to　lift　my　eyes。　My　shoulders；　too；　seemed　trapped　in　a　slump。

　Traitor。　Not　a　misfit；　not　a　wanderer。　Just　a　traitor。　I　was　putting　my　gentle　brothers’　and　sisters’　lives　
into　the　angry　and　motivated　hands　of　my　adopted　human　family。

　My　humans　had　every　right　to　hate　the　souls。　This　was　a　war；　and　I　was　giving　them　a　weapon。　A　way　
to　kill　with　impunity。

　I　considered　this　as　we　ran　through　the　desert　in　the　growing　light　of　dawn—ran　because；　with　the　
Seekers　looking；　we　shouldn’t　be　out　in　the　daylight。

　Focusing　on　this　angle—viewing　my　choice　not　as　a　sacrifice　but　rather　as　arming　the　humans　in　
exchange　for　the　Seeker’s　life—I　knew　that　it　was　wrong。　And　if　I　was　trying　to　save　only　the　Seeker；　
this　would　be　the　moment　when　I　would　change　my　mind　and　turn　around。　She　wasn’t　worth　selling　out　
the　others。　Even　she　would　agree　with　that。

　Or　would　she？　I　suddenly　wondered。　The　Seeker　didn’t　seem　to　be　as…　what　was　the　word　Jared　had　
used？Altruistic。　As　altruistic　as　the　rest　of　us。　Maybe　she　would　count　her　own　life　dearer　than　the　lives　
of　many。

　But　it　was　too　late　to　change　my　mind。　I’d　already　thought　far　beyond　just　saving　the　Seeker。　For　one　
thing；　this　would　happen　again。　The　humans　would　kill　any　souls　they　came　across　unless　I　gave　them　
another　option。　More　than　that；　I　was　going　to　save　Melanie；　and　that　was　worth　the　sacrifice。　I　was　
going　to　save　Jared　and　Jamie；　too。　Might　as　well　save　the　repugnant　Seeker　while　I　was　at　it。

　The　souls　were　wrong　to　be　here。　My　humans　deserved　their　world。　I　could　not　give　it　back　to　them；　but　
I　could　give　them　this。　If　only　I　could　be　sure　that　they　would　not　be　cruel。

　I　would　just　have　to　trust　Doc；　and　hope。　

　

　I　wondered　how　many　human　lives　I　would　save。　How　many　souls’　lives　Imight　save。　The　only　one　I　
couldn’t　save　now　was　myself。

　I　sighed　heavily。　Even　over　the　sound　of　our　exerted　breathing；　Jared　heard　that。　In　my　peripheral　vision；　
I　saw　his　face　turn；　felt　his　eyes　boring　into　me；　but　I　did　not　look　over　to　meet　his　gaze。　I　stared　at　the　
ground。

　We　got　to　the　jeep’s　hiding　place　before　the　sun　had　climbed　over　the　eastern　peaks；　though　the　sky　
was　already　light　blue。　We　ducked　into　the　shallow　cave　just　as　the　first　rays　painted　the　desert　sand　
gold。

　Jared　grabbed　two　bottles　of　water　out　of　the　backseat；　tossed　one　to　me；　and　then　lounged　against　the　
wall。　He　gulped　down　half　a　bottle　and　wiped　his　mouth　with　the　back　of　his　hand　before　he　spoke。

　“I　could　tell　you　were　in　a　hurry　to　get　out　of　there；　but　we　need　to　wait　until　dark　if　you’re　planning　a　

smash　and　grab。”

　I　swallowed　my　mouthful　of　water。　“That’s　fine。　I’m　sure　they’ll　wait　for　us　now。”

　His　eyes　searched　my　face。

　“I　saw　your　Seeker；”　he　told　me；　watching　my　reaction。　“She’s…　energetic。”

　I　nodded。　“And　vocal。”

　He　smiled　and　rolled　his　eyes。　“She　doesn’t　seem　to　enjoy　the　acmodations　we　provided。”

　My　gaze　dropped　to　the　floor。　“Could　be　worse；”　I　mumbled。　The　strangely　jealous　hurt　I’d　been　feeling　

leaked；　uninvited；　into　my　voice。

　“That’s　true；”　he　agreed；　his　voice　subdued。

　“Why　are　they　so　kind　to　her？”　I　whispered。　“She　killed　Wes。”

　“Well；　that’s　your　fault。”

　I　stared　up　at　him；　surprised　to　see　the　slight　curve　of　his　mouth；　he　was　teasing　me。

　“Mine？”

　His　small　smile　wavered。　“They　didn’t　want　to　feel　like　monsters。　Not　again。　They’re　trying　to　make　up　

for　before；　only　a　little　too　late—and　with　the　wrong　soul。　I　didn’t　realize　that　would…　hurt　your　feelings。　

I　would　have　thought　you’d　like　it　better　that　way。”

　“I　do。”　I　didn’t　want　them　to　hurt　anyone。　“It’s　always　better　to　be　kind。　I　just…”　I　took　a　deep　breath。　
“I’m　glad　I　know　why。”

　Their　kindess　was　for　me；　not　for　her。　My　shoulders　felt　lighter。　

　

　“Long　night；”　he　mented。　“And　we’ve　got　another　one　ing。　We　should　sleep。”　
I　was　glad　for　his　suggestion。　I　knew　he　had　many　questions　about　exactly　what　this　raid　meant。　I　also　
knew　he　would　have　already　put　several　things　together。　And　I　didn’t　want　to　discuss　any　of　it。


　I　stretched　out　on　the　smooth　patch　of　sand　beside　the　jeep。　To　my　shock；　Jared　came　to　lie　beside　me；　


right　beside　me。　He　curled　around　the　curve　of　my　back。　
“Here；”　he　said；　and　he　reached　around　to　slide　his　fingers　under　my　face。　He　pulled　my　head　up　from　
the　ground　and　then　moved　his　arm　under　it；　making　a　pillow　for　me。　He　let　his　other　arm　drape　over　my　
waist。


　It　took　a　few　seconds　before　I　was　able　to　respond。　“Thanks。”　
He　yawned。　I　felt　his　breath　warm　the　back　of　my　neck。　“Get　some　rest；　Wanda。”　
Holding　me　in　what　could　only　be　considered　an　embrace；　Jared　fell　asleep　quickly；　as　he　had　always　


been　able　to　do。　I　tried　to　relax　with　his　arm　warm　around　me；　but　it　took　a　long　time。　
This　embrace　made　me　wonder　how　much　he　had　already　guessed。　
My　weary　thoughts　tangled　and　twisted。　Jared　was　right—it　had　been　a　very　long　night。　Though　not　half　


long　enough。　The　rest　of　my　days　and　nights　were　going　to　fly　by　as　if　they　were　only　minutes。　
The　next　thing　I　knew；　Jared　was　shaking　me　awake。　The　light　in　the　little　cavern　was　dim　and　orangey。　
Sunset。　
Jared　pulled　me　to　my　feet　and　handed　me　a　hiker’s　meal　bar—this　was　the　kind　of　rations　they　kept　


with　the　jeep。　We　ate；　and　drank　the　rest　of　our　water；　in　silence。　Jared’s　face　was　serious　and　focused。　
“Still　in　a　hurry？”　he　asked　as　we　climbed　into　the　jeep。　
No。　I　wanted　the　time　to　stretch　out　forever。　
“Yes。”　What　was　the　point　in　putting　it　off？　The　Seeker　and　her　body　would　die　if　we　waited　too　long；　


and　I　would　still　have　to　make　the　same　choice。


　“We’ll　hit　Phoenix；　then。　It’s　logical　that　they　wouldn’t　notice　this　kind　of　raid。　It　doesn’t　make　sense　for　
humans　to　take　your　cold…storage　tanks。　What　possible　use　could　we　have　for　them？”　
The　question　didn’t　sound　at　all　rhetorical；　and　I　could　feel　him　looking　at　me　again。　But　I　stared　ahead　

at　the　rocks　and　said　nothing。　
It　had　been　dark　for　a　while　by　the　time　we　traded　vehicles　and　got　to　the　freeway。　Jared　waited　a　few　
careful　minutes　with　the　inconspicuous　sedan’s　lights　off。　I　counted　ten　cars　passing　by。　Then　there　was　a　
long　darkness　between　the　headlights；　and　Jared　pulled　onto　the　road。　
The　trip　to　Phoenix　was　very　short；　though　Jared　kept　the　speed　scrupulously　below　the　limit。　Time　was　

　

city。　I　saw　the　hospital　from　the　road。　We　followed　another　car　up　the　exit　ramp；　moving　evenly；　without　
hurry。　
Jared　turned　into　the　main　parking　lot。　
“Where　now？”　he　asked；　tense。　
“See　if　this　road　continues　around　the　back。　The　tanks　will　be　by　a　loading　area。”　
Jared　drove　slowly。　There　were　many　souls　here；　going　in　and　out　of　the　facility；　some　of　them　in　scrubs。　

Healers。　No　one　paid　us　any　particular　attention。　
The　road　hugged　the　sidewalk；　then　curved　around　the　north　side　of　the　building　plex。　
“Look。　Shipping　trucks。　Head　that　way。”　
We　passed　between　a　wing　of　low　buildings　and　a　parking　garage。　Several　trucks；　delivering　medical　

supplies　no　doubt；　were　backed　into　receiving　ports。　I　scanned　the　crates　on　the　dock；　all　labeled。

　“Keep　going…　though　we　might　want　to　grab　some　of　those　on　the　way　back。　See—Heal…　Cool…　
Still？　I　wonder　what　that　one　is。”　
I　liked　that　these　supplies　were　labeled　and　left　unguarded。　My　family　wouldn’t　go　without　the　things　

they　needed　when　I　was　gone。When　I　was　gone；　it　seemed　that　phrase　was　tacked　on　to　all　of　my　

thoughts　now。　
We　rounded　the　back　of　another　building。　Jared　drove　a　little　faster　and　kept　his　eyes　forward—there　
were　people　here；　four　of　them；　unloading　a　truck　onto　a　dock。　It　was　the　exactness　of　their　movements　
that　caught　my　attention。　They　didn’t　handle　the　smallish　boxes　roughly；　quite　the　contrary；　they　placed　
them　with　infinite　care　onto　the　waist…high　lip　of　concrete。

　I　didn’t　really　need　the　label　for　confirmation；　but　just　then；　one　of　the　unloaders　turned　his　box　so　the　

black　letters　faced　me　directly。　
“This　is　the　place　we　want。　They’re